Ravenwood - 10/30/02 09:52 AM
My liberal buddy, Jack Cluth, has brought forth the issue of cock fighting. Apparently making cock fighting illegal in Oklahoma is on the ballot this year. Naturally, Jack is against cock fighting and thinks it should be banned.
Cock fighting as a "sport" should be outlawed- period- and the voters of Oklahoma should go back to arguing over things that really matter- like trailer parks or Indian casinos....I think that banning cock fighting doesn't go far enough. Obviously, the chicken death matches will just go underground.
To truly stop cock fighting, you need to address the source of the problem. Chickens. As long as anyone can simply walk into a store and purchase a chicken, no one is safe. I propose a state-wide blanket chicken ban to stop all cock fighting. At the very least, you should need a license to purchase a chicken, and there should be a three day waiting period. That will stop any spontaneous cock fights from starting up.
It should also be illegal to carry a live chicken in your vehicle. That will keep chicken runners from bringing chickens in from states like Virginia that have lax chicken laws. We should also ban the open and concealed carry of chickens. Otherwise cock fights might start up in schools and back alleys across the state.
There are also lots of people that already have chickens. Rather than go door to door confiscating chickens, we should impose a 1000% tax on chicken feed. Even if people continue to purchase feed for their chickens, the extra tax revenue should help fight the problem of chicken injuries caused by cock fight violence.
We should also encourage product liability lawsuits against 'Big Chicken'. Companies like Purdue and Tyson, who willfully market their products toward children, must be held accountable for the criminal misuse of their chickens.
I'm with you Jack. I'm starting a grassroots lobbying organization called Americans for Chicken Safety. ACS feels that this cock fight problem has gone on long enough, and must be addressed. We shouldn't let another chicken suffer unnecessarily for human entertainment.
Category: Cold Dead Hands
Comments (9) top link me
Cock fighting......hell, San Diego's gone WELL past that! We got ourselves some good ol' BUM FIGHTS! (I hear there are still a few stray videos in circulation!)
Posted by: Da Goddess at October 31, 2002 3:28 AMYall are all a bunch of pussies come down to kentucky and well show you what happens to pussies like yall
Really, Rodney. You gonna show me what happens down in Kentucky. Why do I hear "Dueling Banjos" playing in the background. No thanks. I think I'll pass on your homoerotic invitation.
Posted by: Ravenwood at October 23, 2003 1:34 AMHave you ever been to a real cock fight? Do you realize that fighting cocks in the wild would kill each other on contact without the help of humans? What makes you spend so much time and energy on this topic if you dont enjoy the sport then dont attend the derbies. But dont spoil the true sportsmans fun because of your own beliefs. Bottom line if you dont like dont fucking worry about it for god sakes its a fucking bird that was bread to fight, and if he is going to die let him die with some pride of know he was a fighter.
Posted by: Jared "Sabong" Miller at December 5, 2003 3:58 PMApparently sarcasm is lost on you.
Posted by: Ravenwood at December 5, 2003 4:18 PMok, first of all, its not like cocks are going to be extinct anytime soon. Chickens dont even have souls and cant survive on there own. If they didnt have their owner they would die in the wild. If its owner wants to fight him, then thats his decion. Bottom line is that this sport isnt going to put chickens on the endangered list.
Posted by: Tate From Texas at January 15, 2004 9:20 AMthis is the funniest post ever. it kills me that people actually took this seriously, rather than seeing it what it really is -- a satire on gun control. You are all dumbasses.
Posted by: Mays at April 12, 2004 3:56 PMHi I been to alot of cock fights I love them. It not what you idiots think. Banning the sport is hurting a lot of people. Some are the 3rd generation its a family thing. My old man has been going since he was 6 days old and has worked a real job for only 3 mths. of his whole life all he does is fights chickens and hes got it made. yall dont realize the money involved. They are trying to ban is cause they cant tax it just like pot thats why they cant legalize it. Also my old man is 40 do the math. The birds are raised and breed that way so they will fight with or without your help. The fighting cock was almost the national emblem but the bald eagle got it cause george washington was a cockfighter and if it would have got it you couldnt fight them. thomas jefferson and abe lincon even fought chickens. Just so you know people like you who vote to ban it are fucking up alot of peoples lives. get over it its a chicken.
Posted by: Lisa at April 13, 2004 12:47 PMwhat the hell is wrong with yall people you eat chicken dont you well them chickens only get to live for about 16 weeks most cockers have at least most chickens for 2 years the only reason that yall are making a big deal out of it is because yall just have to have something to bitch about and yall need to stay out of our buisness and leave us redneck fuckers alone yall aint gonna change anything so quit causin trouble and quit wastin your little city life time
Posted by: jon at May 13, 2004 1:37 PM(c) Ravenwood and Associates, 1990 - 2014
