The Swiss are deeply concerned over melting ice. So much so, that they are taking radical steps to keep it from happening.

Alarmed by the retreat of its Alpine glacier, a Swiss ski resort on Tuesday wrapped part of the shrinking ice-cap in a giant blanket in a bid to reduce the summer melt.

If successful, officials at the Gemsstock resort above Andermatt in central Switzerland expect the example to be followed elsewhere in the Alps, where scientists say glaciers are under threat from global warming...

Of course envirowackos aren't impressed.

For Martin Hiller, spokesman on climate change for environmentalist group WWF International, who was on hand to witness the Alpine experiment, the move was positive but offered no real answer to ice loss.

"The solution is to switch to clean energy, we need to cut down on harmful pollutants, such as CO2 (carbon dioxide)," he said.

Just switch to clean energy. How simple. Never-mind that there's no such thing as clean energy. Fossile Fuels: duh; Nuclear: nuclear waste; Solar: destroys the landscape; Hydroelectric: destroys the river and acres of land; Wind farms: chop up the birds. There is no easy solution to our energy needs.

Also, CO₂ is not a pollutant. It is a naturally occuring gas just like Nitrogen or Oxygen. It's also what plants breathe. If you get rid of CO₂, you have to get rid of plants and all the animals that eat plants and all the animals that eat animals that eat plants.

Of course I've already solved the CO2 problem. For those of you that missed it, I'll say it again:

Most people think that most of our oxygen comes from trees. But with two-thirds of the Earth's surface covered with water, it actually comes from oceans full of plant plankton, who dutifully convert CO₂ to oxygen through photosynthesis. The biggest harm to plant plankton is not global warming, since a spike in CO₂ would just mean that plant life thrives. Instead, plant plankton's biggest predator is whales. Whales scoop up plankton by the truckload. It would seem obvious then, that the solution is to protect plant plankton by slaughtering whales. With an absence of predators, plant plankton will overpopulate and drastically cut CO₂ levels.